I recently had dinner with my friend Isaac Alvarez, who is an amazing photographer. He shot the image above. And this one below.
We laughed and I told him what I always tell my husband about jealousy – It can be very healthy! As long as you use it to motivate yourself.
Last year, while my husband and I were living in New York City, we went to 5 shows in 5 days.
First was a comedy cabaret, then there was an Alexander Jean concert, aka Marc Ballas and his talented wife BJ Jean. Next was Latin History for Morons, followed byWaitress, and finally an interactive musical called K-Pop.
Each show was incredible. The work was fantastic. The talent was phenomenal. But at the end of the 5 days, I was drained.
I felt like a failure. I felt so talentless. I was jealous.
This excerpt from one of my favorite books (Now is the Time by Patrick Lindsay), applies:
‘Now is the time to appreciate greatness.
Some people deserve our admiration.
Too often we deny it to them because of jealousy of cynicism.
Give respect and admiration where it is due.’
It’s okay to feel jealous of someone. It’s perfectly natural.
It’s not okay to stay jealous.
So if you’re feeling jealous, use it to inspire action. After my little jealousy funk, I got to work – on myself, and on my art. That week, I took another stab at a the screenplay I was working on, wrote some new jokes for my stand up set, and made time to meditate.
I’m currently reading the Artist’s Way.
In Week 3, the author, Julie Cameron, points out that anger is just shining light on what you need to change. The same goes for jealousy. If you’re feeling envious of someone’s life or talent, it’s usually because you aren’t nurturing yours. Get back on track. Take time to love yourself. Then, and only then, can you give love away.
So if you find yourself seeing green, take a step back and use your envy as you would any other resource. Take your anger, or jealousy, or frustration and turn those reactions into fuel.
Turn what seems like a negative into a positive, and use that energy to create something beautiful.